How does ego affect Relationships?

Ego is nothing but a collection of your thoughts from all your past experiences put together.For example,you get to know a person and try to become friends with him/her. And over a period of time, lets say that the friendship evolves into a relationship. During the past meetings and encounters, they would have projected each others mental images. This projection of a person has a physical as well as a mental aspect to it. So, what we end up seeing in a relationship after a period of time, you will see actual persons, but the projection of one person to the other. At some point of time in the relationship, the true nature of these images will come out into the open. When I say true images, these correspond to the manner in which the two people in the relationship projects himself/herself to the other person. Once these images start popping up over the course of time in a relationship, the joyful period gets over and people start getting doubts each others. Anything that is related to your senses will not provide you with a chance for fulfillment of love.

So what does “fulfillment of love” actually mean?

The moment you start aiming for fulfillment, you have to realize that fulfillment is nothing but moving beyond the emotions and this is attained by helping each other. If this happens, there will be no ego and the consequent image projections that happen between two people will not have any value and will rather provide you with enjoyable memories. Also, remember that the prime goal of a relationship is moving out of mental projections. When you allow yourself to form a mental projection of the other person, it will blur your clarity of thought and stop your growth. If you stop your growth in the relationship, inevitably, you will stop the growth of the other person. When I say “growth”, I mean “the growth of fulfillment”. Hence, ego is nothing but a barrier for fulfillment in relationships.

 The other way defining the EGO - It is a combination of your past experiences along with your emotions. So, a person has to get rid of his/her ego in order to experience the true nature of a relationship. If somebody understands the way they live in a relationship, it will ultimately lead to the blossoming of the relationship to the next level. On the contrary, if you allow your life to be based on the mental projection, there is a chance of you going down the path leading to depression. Actually, it will indeed surely lead to depression. So, if one understands the consequences of forming a mental projection and makes the other person in the relationship to understand and realize this, then life itself will become divine. That is the ultimate relationship between you and your ego. Ego has to be understood in another dimension.

 Some people might ask “How do I relate to if he/she commits a mistake? How do I correct him/her?“. Of course, I agree there are people who are really close to us and the only possibility is to realize the entire concept of losing one’s ego and understand that the person has to be open. When you say “Open”, it means that he/she has to have the thought “Okay, I want to know how to grow into this relationship; I want to get these idiotic thoughts out of my head and listen to him/her”. If you are ready to listen to these words, then there is a chance for you to open your heart and start experiencing the true nature of the relationship. The Ego goes then true love will get unveil in a relationship.